(2011, Olivier Megaton)
Luc Besson acolyte Olivier Megaton (Transporter 3) is a capable action film director. Sadly the Robert Mark Kamen/ Luc Besson script feels like it wishes it were as perfect as Luc Besson's 1994 magnum opus Léon: The Professional. Zoe Saldana is cast as Cataleya (named for, I guess, the orchid Cattleya which neither sounds like nor is spelled like Cataleya as a google search will reveal).
Her assassin(?) parents are killed when she is little and she vows revenge. She utilmately comes to America through weak plot contrivances and works for 15 years to become an assassin so she can take her revenge on a Colombian drug lord.
Maori Badass, Cliff "I'm from New Zealand" Curtis, plays Zoe Saldana's uncle who takes her in and teaches her how to kill. Full of crisp action and a nice finale this movie does a few things right (a very few). Zoe Saldana is one of those few things. She is a very capable physical actress and she was not afraid of a bit of nudity. I always liked Michael Vartan and he is appropriate as Zoe Saldana's love interest. I like the multiculturalism of this film, I like the female lead, I like that she is black, and a latina. The world needs more action heroines like this (hopefully paired with more original stories). Luc Besson is still one of the few producers/ directors that can really bring the essential sexiness and action of French comics to the screen without actually adapting any particular comic title and Colombiana feels like a comic. Sadly I wish it had been done better. (5/7)
Trailer
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Conan the Barbarian
(2011, Marcus Nispel)
So what is there to say? Jason Momoa as Conan, with appropriate levels of sexiness, nudity, and violence. Sadly this film lacks the resonance and brilliant character actors of the John Milius original (1982). There are plenty of R.E. Howard-esque moments and Frazetta-like scenery and landscapes but this movie has a dull story and is poorly plotted with a number of very weak edit points and CG. Having once sat on a plane with Sandahl Bergman when I was 8 years old, and considering I think Gerry Lopez is a god, the Milius film will be definitive for me for some time.
Stephen Lang is awesome as a bad guy. I like Said Taghmaoui but he was totally under-utilized. Rachel Nichols is cute and capable and Ron Perlman is the most epic looking barbarian father ever. Rose McGowan is well cast as an evil witch but she seemed wooden or maybe it was just the wooden script. This film at 70 mil. felt made for cable. I will give Jason Momoa this: he has a barbaric backside. Morgan Freeman narration and beautiful Bulgarian backdrops could not save this movie. (5/7)
Trailer
Is it pronounced: KO-NAHN or KONEN?
Go here for more about Texas author and Conan creator, Robert E. Howard
So what is there to say? Jason Momoa as Conan, with appropriate levels of sexiness, nudity, and violence. Sadly this film lacks the resonance and brilliant character actors of the John Milius original (1982). There are plenty of R.E. Howard-esque moments and Frazetta-like scenery and landscapes but this movie has a dull story and is poorly plotted with a number of very weak edit points and CG. Having once sat on a plane with Sandahl Bergman when I was 8 years old, and considering I think Gerry Lopez is a god, the Milius film will be definitive for me for some time.
Stephen Lang is awesome as a bad guy. I like Said Taghmaoui but he was totally under-utilized. Rachel Nichols is cute and capable and Ron Perlman is the most epic looking barbarian father ever. Rose McGowan is well cast as an evil witch but she seemed wooden or maybe it was just the wooden script. This film at 70 mil. felt made for cable. I will give Jason Momoa this: he has a barbaric backside. Morgan Freeman narration and beautiful Bulgarian backdrops could not save this movie. (5/7)
Trailer
Is it pronounced: KO-NAHN or KONEN?
Go here for more about Texas author and Conan creator, Robert E. Howard
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